Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Randomize