Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Randomize
