My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
