I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
