sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
My vagina is officially offended.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
