I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
