even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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