i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
