I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
