She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
