You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Actions speak louder than pants.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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