Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
