i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize