I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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