and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I touched a dick in church today
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize