problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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