True but thats because hes a fetus.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
