im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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