how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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