i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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