think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
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