11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Randomize
