Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Michael Bay diarrhea
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
