Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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