She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
