Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Randomize
