11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
