Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
