i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize
