South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize