very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
