Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I have fence marks all over my body
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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