Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
