Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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