Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize