the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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