We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
