how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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