First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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