i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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