so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
