yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
