your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Screwed.edu
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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