the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My vagina is officially offended.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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