how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
