69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize