just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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