Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Randomize
