Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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