TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
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im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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